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From the 'Discourses on Islamic Way of Life' - By Mufti Taqi Usmani (db)

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“Negligence” is a part of beauty in a woman

Today the times have changed; as a result the values have also changed. A defect in a man is more often looked upon as a point of virtue and beauty in a woman. If we go through the Holy Qur’an carefully we shall see what, is generally considered a defect in a man is considered a point of beauty in a woman. For example. it is a defect in man to be ignorant and negligent, on account of which he is unaware of what is happening in the world. A man has been entrusted with the affairs of the world. To discharge these he needs learning and awareness. If he is devoid of these qualities and abilities, he is faulty and defective to this extent. As for a woman, negligence has been considered by the Qur’an as an item of beauty for her. Allah has said:

"Surely, as for those who slander virtuous, negligent believing women..." (24:23)

The word “negligent’ meaning that they are unaware of what is happening around them in the world. The Qur’an has considered here “negligence” or “unawareness” as an attribute of beauty. It is obvious from this that if a woman is ignorant of the affairs of the world, duties. excepted. this is not a defect but an attribute of beauty as described by the Qur’an.

Do not try to straighten her bent by force

Thus we see a defect in man is not considered a defect in woman and what is not a defect in man is sometimes looked upon as a defect in woman. A man is, therefore, not allowed to be harsh to a woman and misbehave with her if he finds her behaving in her womanly way. The very meaning of her comparison with a rib is that, by nature, she should be different in temperament from you. So now do not try to straighten her by force.

The root cause of the entire conflict

The above is based on a Tradition of the Holy Prophet [sallallaahu alyhi wasallam]. Who can claim to know more about the nature of man and women than the Prophet of Allah? He diagnosed the root cause of all the conflicts between man and woman.Man insists that a woman should be exactly like himself in all her behaviours. This is not possible as she has been created different from him.

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